enough

things that make me smile..

playing guitar

sweating

lifting weights

chase challenging me

new coaching job

working with kids

the sun

running

the water

beautiful views

coldplay

calls from jess

the honest answers people gave me

people recognizing my strengths

my dad is coming to visit

spending time with my friends again

my dads ridiculous posts on Facebook

my mom confiding in me

i've lost weight

i feel stronger

memories of this summer

my new degree 

I'm going into final year

i have so much love that surrounds me

being self aware

I'm writing again

i want to be writing again

singing

maybe writing a song?

liv, what a fucking gem

chris, never failing to spark a smile

josh, for reminding me that i may have lost a lot but i have so much

tacos! 

i bought cheese

getting dad birthday gift

feeling less suffocated

forgiveness

commitment to my best self

flipping

therapy

my friends who step up

not being afraid of being honest even if it makes me vulnerable 

moving in with pete

jamming out with pete

learning again

all my adventures with boyceman

laughing

getting points in jeopardy 

meeting new people

getting my tattoo 

avicii songs

sky full of stars 

my love for music

dancing 

handstands

coaching again

halifax

being spontaneous

road tripping

boyce reading out loud to me

finding out that i can nap

sleeping incredibly well

finding mornings fine

coffee

things I'm tired of...

'are you ok?'

'when is your next appointment'

being afraid to be alone

needing

eating unhealthy shit

walking up hills when i should be running them

not seeing Bren

my shoulder injury

nikker not being nikker

my sisters fighting

my family fighting

missing people

people telling me i give too much

giving too much

the radio

bills, i don't even have many

visa

pleasing others 

therapy

empty promises

empty statements

depending on people

needing approval 

missing home

being called a lesbian

being called judgemental

not liking chicken

bleeding

relationships

needing to be held

thinking I'm weak but knowing I'm strong

crying in front of people

vulnerability 

peoples opinions 

days that go by slowly 

not being busy

'you've gone through so much'

'retarded'

questions

my messy house

living with boys

being confused

being dehydrated

not finishing books, i have 3 on the go now

winter coming

being so self aware

forgiving 

being bullied

constantly trying 

headaches 

my kneecap being bruised

ego

lies

alcohol 

weed

coke

giving up when a run is hard

bulking up

lying to people

hormones

zits

being tired of things

complaining when i have so much to be happy about

thinking more about what I'm losing or lost then what I'm so lucky to have

laundry

junk mail 

my phone

texting

people not answering

caring so much about what people are doing

plans falling through